After the gift: Setting up a device for a child

Having a proactive discussion about online safety and privacy before giving a child their first device is crucial.
Activate privacy settings, set up parental controls, and establish boundaries for a safe online experience.
Instill healthy device use by setting limits, having open conversations, and engaging in shared activities.

Above: Photo by nicomenijes/DepositPhotos

Eight in 10 parents said their child has a phone, and on average, the first phone was given at a little under age 12, a short survey by researcher Erica Parker reveals. In today’s ever-connected society, children and young teens use tech for everything from listening to music to keeping in touch with friends and schoolwork.

However, for those who wish to give a child their very first device, there are a variety of considerations to keep in mind. With the basics of safety at the forefront of the conversation, help with device setup, and how you can promote a healthy relationship with the internet from the start, there are no shortage of ways to be a proactive parent.

A proactive discussion is a must

Before the purchase of your child’s first electronic device, a proactive discussion can go a long way. A conversation about the basics of online safety and the value of privacy is a must before your child receives their first device. Not only does this help educate and make them aware of the benefits and disadvantages of internet use, but will help them understand that how they manage their new device matters. Features such as location sharing, for instance, have the potential to heavily intersect with privacy and security online.

Researchers discovered a connection between location sharing and the communication of strangers with kids and teens through mobile devices. The survey, conducted by Cox Communications, unveiled the fact that of the children and young teens who share their mobile device’s location publicly, 31% have been contacted by a stranger, and 28% of those children’s parents noted that the stranger “referenced their child’s location.” Through a discussion, you can gauge what your child knows already, and what they may need to know more about. This also paves the way for any questions they may have, and sets a baseline of knowledge for how your child can stay safe through the right device settings.

Help with device setup

While many young teens may be excited to set up a new device on their own, there are many ways that you can help set up the device with safety at the forefront of the experience. Valuable first-time setup steps include the implementation of two-factor authentication, firmware updates, and the pre-installation of age-appropriate apps and platforms. Other essential elements can be found in a secure WiFi network and the configuration of age-appropriate settings, such as Safe Search filters and child-safe DNS filtering.

A new device will immediately prompt your child to set up an account, so this provides the perfect opportunity to explain safety right from the start with a strong password. From here, you may wish to help your child pick out additional applications, set their wallpaper, and set up other means of customization. It’s important to guide your child through the process in a kind and informative way.

At the device setup stage, it’s equally as important to consider the value of parental controls. Whether the device is personal or for school, boundaries can help provide a safe online experience. Throughout the device setup process, be sure to activate privacy settings along the way — private social media profiles, safe search for the web, and screen time limits are just a few to look into. If the device is an Android, for example, it is possible to set up parental controls on Google Play — this will put restrictions on the content that is able to be downloaded or purchased on the device based on maturity level.

Device use and healthy habits

How your child uses their device can determine how healthy their relationship is with it. An article from the Mayo Clinic Health System explains that too much screen time has been linked to obesity, poor sleep, violence, less time for play, eye strain, anxiety, depression, and difficulty with school — to highlight just a few. While it’s noted that a one-size-fits-all approach doesn’t work as well as your child grows, reasonable screen time limits can help in conjunction with other practices.

For example, screen time should be balanced with other activities that require in-person social interactions with friends or family members. Keeping screens out of bedrooms, and leading by example can further aid your child in the development of a healthy relationship with internet use.

In addition to screen time, it’s crucial to stay in tune with how your child is using the internet — especially as it pertains to safety. One way to do this is through regular conversations about their internet use, which can be conducted in a kind and casual way. The American Psychological Association (APA) recommends that parents take a multipronged approach, which includes time limits, parental supervision, and discussions.

While limitations on chat features can provide protection against unwanted messages, supervision can help prevent harmful exposure to inappropriate content. “Talk to your teen weekly about how social media platforms work so they feel safe telling you about their experiences without judgement,” the APA recommends. It’s further advised to raise questions — such as about what they saw on social media, or how they might respond to various online situations.

The power of positive examples

Becoming a positive role model is a great way to instill healthy device use among children. While approaches vary from family to family, some ideas include limits on screen time, or proactive conversations about your own experiences online and how you handled certain situations. Device-free dinners, family game nights, or time spent outdoors together can be a great way for your young teen to recharge and reconnect with their real-world surroundings.

One Forbes article cites the words of Tami Bhaumik, VP of Marketing & Digital Civility at Roblox, who explains that for some kids, over-monitoring of internet use may lead to an adverse effect. “It is more helpful to monitor younger kids who are starting out on their online journey, to help them learn the ropes, and in time, allow more freedom,” Bhaumik states, and further notes that the goal is to help kids and teens recognize and respond to potential issues through conversation. Bhaumik also cites results from a Digital Civility survey, which unveils the fact that about a third of U.S. parents (out of 3,500 respondents) sit down and play games with their kids.

As a result, parents are able to help monitor their child’s time online as well as help them understand what their children love about online play in an interactive and enjoyable way. Whether you decide to play an online game, watch an educational video, or connect with far away relatives, quality time spent online together can help create healthy habits right from the start.

Whether for a birthday or the holidays (or just because), technology can make a great gift. If it’s your child’s very first device, however, there are several considerations to keep in mind. Through a proactive discussion about the basics to how you can help from device setup and beyond, there are several ways to be a proactive parent — each of which can help with the development of healthy habits down the line.

About the author

Ali Denning is a freelance writer and researcher. She enjoys contributing to a range of publications, both printed and online, on a variety of tech and cybersecurity topics. When she is not writing, she spends her spare time exploring the great outdoors with her family and dogs.